Agent641

@Agent641@lemmy.world

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Agent641,

The Jews TM are using iron dome to shoot down christian prayers before they reach heaven.

Agent641, (edited )

It was filmed in 2001 as evident by the title but only released in the late 1960s, thats why it looks that way.

Agent641,

Chickens often die shortly after mating. At least, the one I fucked did.

Agent641,

Puff pastry. Never, ever try to make puff pastry at home, it takes forevee, vut xosts like $5 at the shops for a big packet of it

Agent641,

My father died from working the salami mines. He got the pink lung.

Agent641,

Wish granted. You now have catheter and colostomy bags.

Agent641,

How many do I need to eat for it to work?

Agent641,

Whut?

Agent641,

Getting sober is my pick too. Im just over a year in from my last drink. Ive excelled at work, had 3 raises, finished my degree, made quality new friends, met a beautiful woman who is now my best friend, took a chance and kissed her one night, and she kissed back. Life is great.

Agent641,

Overly-attached language app

Agent641,

Black fax - such an effective remote physical attack that fax companies had to actually hard-code a defence against it, to not print pages where there would be enough ink or toner dispensed that it could damage the machine or be a fire hazard

Agent641,

Ah, its time for the nightly “State of the Porch” presidential address

Agent641,

Presidents arent just for christmas, they are a huge commitment. Every year after the holidays, animal shelters fill up with unwanted presidents, and those that cannot be re-homed are euthanised.

Agent641,

Sauron’s vag

Agent641,

One demussy to rule them all

Agent641,

Dying

Agent641,

Butt plug. Literally used to plug up a loose sphincter between poops.

Agent641,

Ive always wondered what sort of gross fetish thing she must be asking for that makes Meatball go “Whoa now, hey, lets just slow it down a bit babe, I’m not doing that, jesus fuck, thats messed up.”

Agent641,

The most heinous fetish of them all

Agent641,

Wait they took that away? I have an S9 and I rely on this to know whos messaging me. Blue is textra, purple is whatsapp, white is insta, green is signal.

Agent641,

He cant cheat if he cant leave the dunny

Agent641,

The laughing stops when you meet someone with the exact same SSN as you.

Agent641,

Good point, cars are really heavy.

Agent641, (edited )

Like big minigolf, where you have to bounce the ball off objects. Maxi-golf

Agent641,

This hole… it was made for him

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