How to keep a man
DonkeyShot, How to keep a man: cut off his scrotum, put it on a plate and have him eat it with maccaroni and corn? 😨
quicksand, Ohh it’s corn. I was wondering what the other yellow was. So much yellow
HonorIsDead, Corn looks like a sludge still thawing out.
hark, 
I couldn’t even tell that was corn.
giggling_engine, 
Looks like yesterday’s corn
_dev_null, 
Reminds me of a joke about a hooker…
NotSpez, Go on…
EdibleFriend, 
No seriously somebody fucking explain that chicken to me. That doesn’t even look raw? I don’t get it at all? What the fuck did she do to it!
I need some serious fucking answers.
Bristlecone, Boiled?
ObviouslyNotBanana, 
Steamed?
Decoy321, (edited ) Steaming chicken is the most boring way to cook chicken. The only way eastern cultures pull it off is with heavy use of seasonings and sauce.
This looks like someone shoved a pepper grinder under their nose and sneezed onto this chicken.
chatokun, I’ve used it for pulled chicken for a soup. I believe the instructions said boil, but I pressure cook/steam it for a few mins then add it into the muchbmore flavorful soup. Though I just as often just use canned chicken breast instead.
Only thing I’ve ever done that for, since I love chicken to have a browned somewhat firm to crunchy crust, depending on which cut it is.
EdibleFriend, Omfg that’s it.
Mirshe, Definitely boiled, looks identical to the chicken my coworker brought in once. She boiled every piece of meat within an inch of its life because she didn’t know how to prepare it otherwise.
grendel, 
Missed opportunity for kholodets.
victorz, Boils all meats? Like steak and things? Freaking barf
LinkOpensChest_wav,
menemen, 
Oh, I guess you are correct. On a firstly glance I thought there was béchamelsauce on it.
the_of_and_a_to, deleted_by_author
DonkeyShot, Me too! Dusgusting ice cream in the form and color of a scrotum!
Ookami38, Looks boiled to temp and covered with pepper. So you’ll have bland, rubbery chicken with a bit of pepper and no flavor from browning.
Igloojoe, I didnt even know that was even a way to cook chicken. Just put it in the oven!
sxan, 
I’ve been hoping that’s gravy. Hope… hope… hope…
independantiste, (edited ) 
Funkytom467, 
At least here the chicken isn’t RAW
norgur, 
That’s not raw,.it’s fucking boiled. No frying pan in sight I guess.
Funkytom467, To be fair i never seen boiled chicken, but i can’t imagine why i would ever see it.
LinkOpensChest_wav, It doesn’t even look boiled. I’ve seen a lot of boiled chicken, and never with a completely smooth texture and the color of Pepto Bismol.
There’s something else desperately wrong with the chicken in the OP, but I can’t put my finger on it.
Bakkoda, Worse, it’s steamed. It got put in a pan on lowish heat and covered.
WhiteOakBayou, Did you have some weird chicken boiling job or is that common in your country? I’ve only ever heard of the practice in internet jokes and have never seen it performed.
LinkOpensChest_wav, My husband has boiled chicken with rice quite a lot. He’ll boil a pot of rice with random things like chicken, corn on the cob, etc.
hydrospanner, It’s definitely not the way to go for taste but I’ve heard of boiled chicken pretty often.
Usually it’s in the context of health reasons (a friend that is a fitness and nutrition guy basically just adds diced boiled chicken breast to fresh salads to add protein with few/any nutrition drawbacks), for babies/young children to add some soft and healthy meat to their diet, other dietary restrictions (can’t have spices or salt, etc.), or it’s going to be added to some other dish that will provide moisture, flavor, etc. My mom will boil chicken to make stock, then use the chicken in Buffalo dip or stir fry or shred it up and toss it in bbq sauce for sandwiches and stuff.
Definitely not in the way shown in the OP though.
norgur, Really? Never seen or eaten boiled chicken? Where do you think chicken broth or chicken soup comes from?
TimewornTraveler, hey op chicken was boiled to perfection 😂
bdonvr, That looks like it at least might have one or two spices on it
JustMy2c, And actually has some mainard browning. The rice looks ok too.
Dunno why adults eat yellow pasta tho… Must be a marketing truck played on poor people.
hungryphrog, At least that looks edible.
Tier1BuildABear, 
You’re talking about the bottom one, aren’t you
AgentGrimstone, This looks 10x better than the OP
menemen, If the photographer was not that bad it might have even looked tasty.
independantiste, (edited ) Id eat that any day it looks good (im not specifying which of the two images, you decide)
Ookami38, At least it has some color lol
nixcamic, This looks like decent food that someone took a picture of in shit lighting.
independantiste, I think it’s more about the second picture
Aremel, What’s that stuff in the “after” pic…?
WeeSheep, I showed this to my husband and asked him if he would like this. Turns out rice with sides of raw chicken and apple sauce get a shudder and gag.
ObviouslyNotBanana, How to keep a man on his toes
CubbyTustard, deleted_by_author
reversebananimals, thematically soft
(ಠ_ಠ)
Viking_Hippie, Sounds like a Hallmark Christmas movie…
iAvicenna, I spent my last minute trying to understand the role of word thematically in that sentence.
Christmas? Sex? Who knows…
Ookami38, (edited ) I think they’re saying the whole meal has a “soft” texture. The theme of the meal is soft, thus it’s thematically soft.
nixcamic, I dunno I don’t think a meal completely devoid of texture is what most texture first people go for.
bobs_monkey, I’ll be the one to say it: kraft dinner is a bastardization of mac and cheese. Stouffer’s is a little better, but the milky-watery cheese powder glop is nasty as hell.
juliebean, with all due respect, kraft dinner is in fact the most valid mac and cheese. other cheap boxes of noodles and cheese powders are also acceptable. real cheese has no place in mac and cheese.
Vej, I don’t get it, what am I missing?
bobs_monkey, (edited ) Does any of that look edible, or at least appetizing?
Vej, No, but I don’t understand what I am looking at either.
BustinJiber, If “a man” puked in there - would we be able to tell the difference?
hungryphrog, I think that she feeds her “man” the same way penguins feed their chicks.
JustMy2c, Not if he ate the same stuff before as well
Famko, Do you keep him in prison?
Funkytom467, The basement evidently.
NegativeLookBehind, 
In a hole you dug, while wearing someone else’s face.
Introversion, It eats the chicken or else it gets the hose again.
vivadanang, or a hospital… ugh
HootinNHollerin, Might we consider what quality of man? Picked up at the Walmart
cryostars, Behind the Walmart dumpster*
HootinNHollerin, Ah it’s Artemis from it’s always sunny! She does like to incorporate buns into lovemaking while in the dumpster
Gestrid, What is that?
johannesvanderwhales, Chicken drumsticks (without skin), mac and cheese mixed with shells and cheese, plus canned corn.
Nothing fancy but this wouldn’t look so horrific with some not-awful lighting. It’s a terrible picture of some pretty typical food.
BoastfulDaedra, …in which country, though?
RedAggroBest, It what world is canned corn looking like that? That looks like yellow vomit
johannesvanderwhales, Looks pretty normal for canned creamed corn to me. Its not a thing I would describe as pretty to begin with, and this is pretty much the lowest tier of it.
BoastfulDaedra, Is that literal shit?
ObviouslyNotBanana, Shit from a butt
PeterPoopshit, (edited ) Wow I can’t wait to projectile diarrhea that into the toilet 8 hours later.
skyspydude1, 8 hours? Look at Mr. Iron Gut over here.
LemmyKnowsBest, I’m pretty sure it’s already diarrhea so at least they saved a step for you.
Gestrid, (edited ) *30 minutes to two hours
No way is my body not rejecting that immediately.
0Xero0, 
why does it look like vomit with someone’s ball sack?
ObviouslyNotBanana, Castrate your man and eat his balls to show dominance and keep him subservient
LifeInMultipleChoice, Why is the chicken looking raw
Crafter72, 
Uhhh, the picture seems like out of this world and at the same time the corn thingy reminds me garmonbozia
phonyphanty, This how You keep a spirit of the Black Lodge …
thawed_caveman, c/shittyfoodporn
HootinNHollerin, (edited )
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