lemmyshitpost

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Dabro, in Let's not mention that His dad was looking at your dick.

Is that Mormon Jesus I spy?

The_Lopen,

That’s him. I’ve only ever seen a middle-eastern Jesus displayed in my church building once, but it looked much better than this one. I wish we didn’t use this depiction as much as we do.

beckerist, in 'We are splattered here today'

This basically describes the first scene in The Boys

rockerface,

The consequences of unprotected handholding

Zoboomafoo,

She got what she deserved, pedestrians shouldn’t be on the street where the cars and speedsters are /s

thatsTheCatch, in Mario or something idk I dont watch anime

His cheeks ain’t the only place he’s storing nuts

JoShmoe,

I always store my nuts in the cheeks

Llewellyn,

In whose cheeks?

PeterPoopshit, (edited ) in anvil posting

For $1000, I wonder if someone could rig together a very shitty way of making low quality anvils out of garbage like aluminum or very shitty steel/cast iron and pass it off as a “real anvil” that I found in the dump or something.

That would be a lot of work of course but in today’s economy and job market, a huge amount of effort just to get $1000 isn’t necessarily a waste of time especially if you can do it multiple times before they find out.

mojofrododojo,

talking to blacksmithy friends - that’s kinda what amazon / harbor freight are doing with their shitty anvils already.

HerbalGamer,
@HerbalGamer@sh.itjust.works avatar

I think they say $4 per pound of steel is reasonable so you could probably run a harbor freight scheme and clear them out.

flambonkscious, in 'We are splattered here today'

Great title, that was perfect

Speculater, in 'We are splattered here today'
@Speculater@lemmy.world avatar

“A child dented my bumper this morning.”

flambonkscious,

Reminds me of those insurance claim attemps “a stationary car reversed into me”.

Can’t imagine that goes down well

dept,

i mean my dad was rear ended causing him to rear end the person in front. Insurance didn’t believe him before the dashcam footage.

variants,

A car tried to reverse onto me the other day, at a red light they went forward then popped it into reverse and backed up really quick but luckily stopped before it hit me

MaoZedongers,

Dod they pop it into reverse or was it just them slow shifting a manual and having it roll backwards?

variants,

No the reverse lights came on, I panicked and didn’t get to pop off a honk

webghost0101, in If you like pina coladas, you might also like walks in the rain

Real tea lovers eat the dry herbs straight from the bag.

PopcornTin,

A bag? I just rip the leaves off a tree and suck on 'em.

waz, in Okay, okay, you talked me into coffee.

Isn’t a raptor a bird?

Annoyed_Crabby,
WhiskyTangoFoxtrot,

It’s a bird! It’s a plane!

FlyingSquid,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

They mean velociraptor, but they’re called raptors in Jurassic Park multiple times, so…

tubaruco,

“velociraptor”

cause those thing in jp are not velociraptors

FlyingSquid,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

I know, the real ones were the size of turkeys. I still wouldn’t want to run into one.

tubaruco,

i would love to run into one, but only after knowing how aggressive they would be

in case theyre very aggressive i would like them to be in something similar to an aviary, so that they wont hurt me

PunnyName, in Me and my kid IRL

Thank you, Red Ball.

Assman, in Lmk
@Assman@sh.itjust.works avatar

Just fine dining and breathing, I’m afraid

chuckleslord,

“My name?”

PeterPoopshit, (edited ) in >>>>

Having sex with women is considered gay in 2024. Since it’s gay either way, you might as well go for the bussy.

unexposedhazard, in Me and my kid IRL

I mean, hell yeah…

Macrocarpa, in Old lady
son_named_bort, in Lmk

I know nothing about anything.

altima_neo, in Me and my kid IRL
@altima_neo@lemmy.zip avatar

He just does his boy dirty like that? Damn!

0x4E4F,

Lol 🤣… yeah, he likes it 🤣…he starts falling slow motion to the ground to evade the attack and pick up something bigger from the neverending imaginary aresenal 🤣.

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