lemmyshitpost

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neonred, in Improvise. Adapt. Overcome.

Hm, just a moment, I’ll put my telephone handset into the acoustic coupler real quick so I can post my contact on the bbs

768,

www.youtube.com/watch?v=usWfJ0EJLB0&t=949

It’s a personal portable transportable cellular telephone.

Anarki_,

Yeess, Kung Fury!

c10l,

Careful you might get hacked

www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3yUSRom2CM

AnonWyo,

Would you like to play a game?

FrasseFisk, in Can't remember the last time I wasn't tired

Translation: 1:00, 2:00, 3:00, 4:00, 5:00, 6:00, 7:00, 8:00, 9:00, 10:00, 11:00, 12:00, 13:00, 14:00, 15:00, 16:00, 17:00, 18:00, 19:00, 20:00, 21:00, 22:00, 23:00, 0:00

RTRedreovic,

Thanks.

danc4498,

You mean 0:00mn

Cruxifux, in Choose A or B

B, and it isn’t even close.

STRIKINGdebate2,
@STRIKINGdebate2@lemmy.world avatar

What about B appeals to you

FanciestPants,

Infinite uncles means the population of earth is completely unsustainable and the collapse of every system is imminent.

MightyGalhupo,

Infinite uncles means infinite food and you can always just let them die, since you have infinite, there’s always gonna be more that aren’t dead

joenforcer,

To be fair, infinite rare fish also means this, maybe even more so.

platypode,
@platypode@sh.itjust.works avatar

Also balding

Cruxifux,

It’s more that infinite uncles implies an incredibly high rate of being molested. If it’s literally infinite, it’s being molested a lot.

STRIKINGdebate2,
@STRIKINGdebate2@lemmy.world avatar

Wouldn’t the non molester uncles protect you from the molester uncles thereby creating war on earth between the uncles that want to molest you and the ones that want to protect you.

Cruxifux,

I would also like to prevent a war where one possible outcome is a whole army molesting me.

lowleveldata,

I would watch that movie

Magikjak,

Uncles or fish is irrelevant, infinite anything with mass presumably fills the entire space of the universe immediately and collapses everything into a giant singularity.

HonoraryMancunian,

Only within a finite space. If the universe is infinite then they can be spaced arbitrarily far apart

GiveMemes, (edited )

The thing is that the universe is as far as we can tell the not infinite, just infinitely expanding. The known universe is measurable (like 46 billion light years)

Idk what that implies for the existence of open space however. Like if that is infinite or if it is somehow created.

Cruxifux,

The concept of infinite nothing is hard to fathom.

Zaphod,

If the space was infinite, we wouldn’t exist.

From the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy:

It is known that there are an infinite number of worlds, simply because there is an infinite amount of space for them to be in. However, not every one of them is inhabited. Therefore, there must be a finite number of inhabited worlds. Any finite number divided by infinity is as near to nothing as makes no odds, so the average population of all the planets in the Universe can be said to be zero. From this it follows that the population of the whole Universe is also zero, and that any people you may meet from time to time are merely the products of a deranged imagination.

MeatsOfRage,

Always hard and infinite uncles could be a horror movie

CoffeeJunkie,

Fuck taxes

hydrospanner,

For me, literally everything except the balding and I really couldn’t give a shit, I’ll buzz it all off anyway.

Infinite rare fish? Well as it happens, fishing is my biggest hobby, so that’s just fuckin delightful.

Mongolian real estate empire? Well that’s passive income and/or something I can sell. As a mongol mogul, in gonna try working the angle of an exotic but affordable fishing, hunting, and nature tourism destination, really try to put Mongolia on the map for Western tourists.

No taxes dovetails nicely here, also making it easier to both expand as well as make the business model more resilient.

Neighbors scared of me? Great! If they seem cool, I’ll reach out to them, otherwise, fear is a great way to not have to deal with shitty neighbors! In Mongolia they’ll be far away anyway.

Night light to keep the monsters at bay.

And the balding we will deal with by just keeping it buzzed low or shaving my head completely.

ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling,
@ThisIsAManWhoKnowsHowToGling@lemmy.dbzer0.com avatar
EvilEyedPanda, in Success is built through GAMBA

Don’t forget the government bailout when their gamble fails.

kpw,

Only applies if you won enough already.

c0mbatbag3l,
@c0mbatbag3l@lemmy.world avatar

Get enough of the country on your payroll and you can just claim it’s bad for the economy if you go under.

Taps head

EvilEyedPanda,

Modern problems man.

bernieecclestoned, in Should I quit my monthly expenses for alcohol?

Making 400k and paying rent. Highly regarded.

LufyCZ,

Renting doesn’t just mean that you can’t afford to buy. It’s got other advantages, like not having to deal with repairs, upkeep, being able to move pretty much on a whim… Guess that’s worth it to some ppl

jelloeater85, in Fish Taco
@jelloeater85@lemmy.world avatar

I hate everything about this photo… Really, like everything. I mean, this really is a genuine shit post. Like if I wasn’t so flabbergasted, I would just closed my browser and go back what I was doing. But here we are… OPs fish abomination and my eye balls, now married in a photonic exchange that I wish never happened… You win OP.

Exusia, (edited )
@Exusia@lemmy.world avatar

My uninformed impression and story I made up seeing an admin badge, is that someone reported this, and an admin came down to see what it was about, only to throw their hands up and say “well shit it doesnt break any rules but I too hate it!”

Thank you jello, I’m sorry my post has assaulted your eyes to the point that your day is ruined, however I am honored to have won lol

jelloeater85,
@jelloeater85@lemmy.world avatar

💯🥳

Hyperreality, in Electrician job

He's wearing rubber flipflops. He'll be fine.

AgentGrimstone, in Why do it

I remember seeing a video of a dude exploring a cave and he was crawling through some narrow ass space tighter than under my bed. Why would one want to do this??? What if it was a dead end? How tf are you gonna turn around? Crawl backwards? I just can’t with any of this

Kage520,

Don’t forget the spiders

BilboBargains,

You will never reap the rewards of being trapped under water for hours with that kind of attitude.

Rolando,

The Eternal Reward, that is.

UFODivebomb,

I used to go spelunking… I honestly can’t answer you. Kinda neat but mostly just being in the total dark in a tiny space surrounded by rocks.

On the plus side i can basically fall asleep in an MRI

XTornado,

I don’t think the main problem to fall sleep in an MRI is the small space.

UFODivebomb,

True. They are very noisy but the nurses all seem initially concerned with claustrophobia.

MeatsOfRage,

How about this, there’s people that do this underwater. They take the tank off their back, push it out ahead of them. If they get stuck, they don’t have 27 hours to try and figure their shit out, they have a couple hours at best

dejected_warp_core,

That’s where I draw the line.

Normal spelunking, minimal vertical work, the occasional belly crawl no smaller than a manhole. That’s actually a pretty good time. You get wet, dirty, have a few laughs with your friends, and then shake it off with some beers back at the campsite. No need to go aggressive with ridiculously tight crawls and/or 100’s of feet of vertical work, etc.

Cave diving? Let’s take an activity where it’s very easy to loose track of time, and add SCUBA which requires time management down to the minute for your health and survival. Nevermind getting lost, disoriented, or wedged underwater somewhere. I get that this is very intrepid stuff, and the very distant corners of cave systems are being explored this way. But it’s a big no for me; the risk does not justify the reward, IMO.

HelixDab2,

SCUBA is even worse because any movement kicks up sediment, so that visibility quickly turns to nil. Cave diving has a very, very high mortality rate; BASE jumping is safer.

Willer,

at least in a water cave you die with a predictable speed.

Gork,

Not to mention unexpected currents that can either smack you against nearby rocks or sweep you further downward in an uncontrolled manner.

vsh,
@vsh@lemm.ee avatar

Same as sky jumping

Adrenaline.

user224, (edited )
@user224@lemmy.sdf.org avatar

I’ve seen such video. The dude struggled to move because he just barely fit in enough to still be able to breathe. There was water in there, and he said he has to return because it’s starting to fill with water.

Fill with water? Nope. Nope. Why would I go in such space.

Edit: Maybe this could be it: youtu.be/6Yf0gDzUMFA
https://youtu.be/6Yf0gDzUMFA

chiliedogg,

Funny thing is I’m terrified of spelunking, but actively working towards being certified for cave diving.

Fill it with water and I’m interested!

I think part of it is that I can’t get stuck as easily with scuba gear strapped on my back, and I don’t have to worry about gravity fucking me over.

And I’ll never go anywhere that requires squeezing my fat ass through a crack.

electric_nan,

I can relate. I did some cave diving in Mexico, and it was incredible. Having said that, there are some locations I would dive again, and some I definitely would not.

PopShark,

Those guys got blessed by the algorithm or something I recognize the channel and video. Don’t know why YouTube decided I would be interested in spelunking but their videos are pretty entertaining at least. Personally I’ll take heights over tight spaces anyday.

grendel,
@grendel@lemmy.world avatar

I’ve watched quite a few of this guy’s videos, and I’m lead to believe that lots of his “wow this is really dangerous right now” moments are acted up. Maybe he gets into sketchy situations, but whatever he shows in the videos looks more like excuses to add a click-baity title without being outright click bait.

Boomkop3, in Group chat

And then they wonder why their kids need therapy

ickplant,
@ickplant@lemmy.world avatar

Can confirm, am therapist.

Boomkop3,

I’m sorry. I’m glad you’re there to help! Too often do kids go without for too long

ickplant,
@ickplant@lemmy.world avatar

I love my job, and I love seeing positive changes in my clients. And I can confirm that it’s ~90% dealing with people whose parents sucked. The others usually experienced some kind of adult trauma or just want to explore themselves more.

1984, (edited )
@1984@lemmy.today avatar

Everyone’s parents suck, and today’s kids will fuck up their kids also. It’s almost unavoidable as part of the separation process, where kids will try to be as different from their parents as possible.

This causes conflicts and parents reacting in “wrong” ways to their kids being morons. :)

ickplant,
@ickplant@lemmy.world avatar

There is such a thing as abuse. Not everyone’s parents suck. Some beat their children, some love them. Sure, everyone hates their parents at some point, and it’s all relative. You’re making it sound like abusive parents don’t exist.

EatYouWell,

And don’t talk to them anymore.

FunkyMonk,

No they don't, they just want more obediance no matter what and degrade you for having any needs at all.

TheBlue22,

Hitting a child is not parenting. It’s abuse.

There is nothing a child learns from being hit, only violence. There are ways to show a child that they did wrong, hitting them is not one of them

Aurenkin,

You’re a child, that means I provide food, lodging and transportation in exchange for you taking care of my emotional needs. I’m a good parent because you haven’t starved to death.

Boomkop3, (edited )

Except they never consented to that deal, and you made them too young to make major life decisions. Fix that first, then ask them again when they’re in their 20 if they’d like to help you. But I think you might already know what position you put yourself in. Enjoy the daycare home in your old age

Let’s hope the next generation has learned what not to do

originalucifer, (edited ) in Blue Fluid !!!
@originalucifer@moist.catsweat.com avatar

dunno... in an industry known for incompetence, youre going to make it a part of your marketing?

true to brand i spose

c0mbatbag3l,
@c0mbatbag3l@lemmy.world avatar

Why do you think they used the blonde woman for the post? At least they have misogyny to call back on.

DreamTraveler, (edited )

The blonde thing fits… the lid is still on.

MaoZedongers, (edited )

Nah dumb blonde is universal, look at every surfer dude bro ever.

PerogiBoi, in I'm never lonely cuz i got these little guys with me :)
@PerogiBoi@lemmy.ca avatar

I got grounded for insisting I saw these when I was younger. I am now vindicated 😎

kratoz29,
@kratoz29@lemm.ee avatar

This seems like a very… Odd reason to get grounded.

Sombyr,

Some parents are weird. I once got grounded because I left my room, forgot something, and went back in to get it. Wasn’t even going anywhere or doing anything important. Just randomly got yelled at and grounded.

PerogiBoi,
@PerogiBoi@lemmy.ca avatar

With my parents it was either agree that they’re right or be punished.

Sombyr,

My dad was like that. I remember a moment where my dad couldn’t understand the solution to the Monty Hall problem, so I tried to explain it to him and instantly got yelled at and sent to my room for contradicting him.

PerogiBoi,
@PerogiBoi@lemmy.ca avatar

Let’s never repeat this bullshit narcissism to our kids if we choose to have em.

Sombyr,

Are you coming onto me?

Ah, just kidding. In seriousness though, I’ve chosen not to have kids on account of being so mentally fucked up by my childhood that I don’t want to put a kid through having me as a parent.

Although luckily my dad did mellow out with age. He’d kinda also been equally fucked up by his own childhood and refused to seek help until I’d left, my mom left, and later my old sibling left, and I refused to speak with him anymore. Last year I got a massive, 4 page, single spaced apology from him for everything he’d done, so luckily things are looking up at least.

PerogiBoi,
@PerogiBoi@lemmy.ca avatar

That’s good to hear at least that your dad somewhat came around. Mine left the family and sued us (lost but cost me tens of thousands in legal fees) and ran off with all the money. He now has a second family.

smeg, (edited )

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man. It deepens like a coastal shelf. Get out as early as you can, And don’t have any kids yourself.

This Be The Verse by Philip Larkin

TheRealKuni,

I wish I’d known this before I heard it in Ted Lasso, but damn that episode was good regardless.

feedum_sneedson,

I pronounced “nuclear” wrong.

Googlyman64, in Fellow landchads of Lemmy. Don't you hate when this happens?

god, that must be so traumatizing for that landlord. landlords have it so hard these days 🥺

qarbone,

Yeah! Do you know some people don’t even tip anymore? Like what happened to the common decency in America?

Vengefu1Tuna, in Here as well

Oh my god, Linux makes you fat.

Kalkaline,
@Kalkaline@leminal.space avatar

Or getting old makes you fat

ivanafterall,
@ivanafterall@kbin.social avatar

Maybe they got super jacked?

wreckedcarzz,
@wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world avatar

Since I like geeky boys, they can come over and get jacked anytime

ChlorineAddict,

I’m listening…

wreckedcarzz,
@wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world avatar

(James May voice)

Hello.

Sallp, (edited ) in Revolutionary free thinker Andrew Tate
@Sallp@lemmy.world avatar

Is he the one that got arrested for human trafficking.

FakinUpCountryDegen,

Yeah, it’s comically bad how false the allegations are, tho.

…despite this dude being a fuckwit, he didn’t do any human trafficking.

Dagwood222,

The funniest part of the story [for me.]

He posted on Twitter about his magnificent car collection, and Greta Thunberg posted back that he was a giant manchild [ or words to that effect] Offended, he got into a flame war. Meanwhile, there’s an NGO called GRETA, which works against trafficking. Someone tells Andy that he’s on GRETA’s radar. Incensed, he posts a video that gives clues to his location. The police use that video to find and arrest him.

If he’d acted like the powerful leader he aspires to be, he would have ignored the posts. Instead, he took the bait and got caught, just like a little fish

dangblingus,

The reality is, the police knew he was in Romania, and they knew that he owns property in Romania. When you fly into a country, the government knows. He was already under investigation and the arrest just coincidentally synchronized with the pizzabox photo.

fushuan,

Iirc they knew he was in Romania, but not where in Romania. The pizzabox photo let them call the store to ask the address of the delivery.

amio,

Greta Thunberg posted back that he was a giant manchild [ or words to that effect] Offended, he got into a flame war.

Quite unlike a giant manchild, of course. True aLpHa BeHaViOr!

Dagwood222,

It’s one of the lessons he teaches his students/acolytes; the person who speaks less in a meeting is the one in control. Too bad he couldn’t learn his own lesson.

frezik,

Wow, I had no idea I was in control so much. As opposed to being invited to meetings I don’t need to be on and have nothing useful to contribute to.

sebinspace,

You’re leaving out what the evidence was HE DOXXED HIMSELF WITH A PIZZA BOX YOU CANT MAKE THIS SHIT UP

lowleveldata, in Discord rule

Ridiculous! We should protest this by making Lemmy posts for announcing masturbations

ShitOnABrick,
@ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world avatar

Yes annocement #1: im now mastrobating

BackOnMyBS,
@BackOnMyBS@lemmy.world avatar

omg, pls! why??? im in bed trying to get sleepy so i can go to work with decent rest tomorrow, but instead, im in bed lmao because you guys want to start a ridiculous movement 😆

ShitOnABrick, (edited )
@ShitOnABrick@lemmy.world avatar

I was on the nyc subway when this happened. I was chilling browsing the Web when one my homies hit me up on discord and sent me a gif of a big musslely black man doing the thugshaker I then began to start furiously mastrobating to the picture of the big mussley blackman doing the thugshaker people started looking at me and saying things such as omg and stop it I then in a haste dropped my phone and one by one all the other men in the train started to furiously mastrobate too. My peenis was but a little stub at this point.by the end the entire train was filled with mastrobating men all hovered over one phone playing a gif of a man doing the thugshaker. Be warned @I’m back on my bs you may suffer the same fate to if your not careful

BackOnMyBS,
@BackOnMyBS@lemmy.world avatar

suffer?

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