Time…that I have to dedicate to stroking to imaginary sky god’s ego. Apologizing for my “transgressions” because apparently just admitting to and apologizing for them makes you no longer in trouble for them anymore…because that makes a lot of sense. It’s just real estate in my brain that could be better spent on other things.
I don’t mean to sound cynical, but Pastafarian Is ment to be a joke. named after Rastafarians. People that thought Haile Selassie was the second coming of Christ.
That wasn’t the start was. It started when God said " go to the middle of nowhere bro, trust me bro" "If you’re going to make an insult, do it properly."
May have to ask a practicing Pastafarian to weigh in on whether this is a legitimate depiction of the noodlely goodness, or whether it’s like a white Jesus situation.
And here I thought the communion wafers SOMEHOW being the body of christ or something. At least pastafari get to cut out all that allegorical nonsense.
I sacrifice C:\Windows\System32 to you, old noodly one! 🗑️ Bless me with the computing power to pwn my enemies in CS2, see them driven before me on Twitch, and hear the Lamentations of their simps.
I’m an ordained minister in The Church of the FSM and I approve this liturgy. I should seriously ask Bobby if this can make it into official church doctrine.
I believe that the big bang was an overcooked ravioli that burst us all into existence, in the name of the fusilli, the sacchettoni, and the holy gnocchi, al dente.
It makes way more sense than the other cults imo. Like, I won’t get disowned by my family if I change my mind, and in an emergency he can nourish me with his noodly appendage.
Idk man, “though shalt not have other gods before me” pretty much directly implies that other gods exist, and we’re square just as long as I don’t worship the flying spaghetti monster below God.
Then of course we shift to monotheism in the more recent Old Testament.
Is it really? I am FSM “ordained”, but as far as I know it is not accepted in the states I operate in. Not to worry, I am ordained in at least two other accepted online churches. I only do this for close family.
“Cause! I’m not going to potentially spend my entire life following the specific rituals and sacrifices required of a religion. What if it doesn’t exist? Then I’ve wasted. My… Oh… Shit.”
I don’t need to. I KNOW the emperor of mankind will launch a glorious crusade to purge the Xenos and claim humanity’s birthright among the stars. Which means we need to triple our science funding yesterday if we’re going to have black hole cannons.
Your faith is lacking slag. The God Emperor of All Mankind is already here leading Mankind to glory over the xenos and has been for millennia. He has chosen to not reveal himself to us yet. Accelerating our approach to the age of strife is blasphemy. What if we build the black hole cannons too early and they’ve degraded too much when the Adeptus Mechanicus excavate them. Have faith in the God Emperor’s plan slag and rejoice in your duty.
Huh, I was unaware of this church. I hope you realize that we were role playing characters from a table top board game gone super franchise titled Warhammer and Warhammer 40,000. As far as I’m aware, the Warhammer franchise is not associated in any way with the Columbus, Ohio Christian Xenos Church. That’s why I included terms like Adeptus Mechanics which is pulled directly from the franchise.
Oh yeah I know. It’s a humorous coincidence, at least to me. Warhammer seems pretty cool. I don’t have the bandwidth or storage space, money, or time to really get into it.
I did try eisenhorn unlimited. Couldn’t get into it.
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