lemmyshitpost

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MrJameGumb, in Oreos set to replace communion wafers.
@MrJameGumb@lemmy.world avatar

The body of Christ now has a sweet creamy center just like me!

tacosanonymous,

You’re ready to let Jesus inside you.

AnonWyo,

“Jesus is coming!”

I damn well hope so. He’s been edging for 2,000 years.

jabathekek,
@jabathekek@sopuli.xyz avatar

The rapture is starting to smell very sticky.

CodexArcanum, in You ask too much of him

It helps to be tripping absolute balls on mushrooms, peyote, or other hallucinogens. Well “helps” in the sense that while the angel will seem normal, ordinary rocks will now terrify you.

Hellnikko,

That’s where the burning bush comes in.

HeyThisIsntTheYMCA,
@HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world avatar

I’ve got an ointment what should help with that

Nutteman, (edited ) in Double Barrel
@Nutteman@lemmy.world avatar

If you are in Grand Rapids, Michigan, there’s a little hot dog spot called Yesterdog. They’ve got a secret menu. Ask for a slut dog.

beckerist,

Why do I feel like this is a set up…?

bmsok,

… you’ve never doubled down before?

Nutteman,
@Nutteman@lemmy.world avatar

It’s an actual thing you can order. They just throw 2 dogs in 1 bun for you.

Jackcooper,

I prob won’t be

What is a slut dog

Nutteman,
@Nutteman@lemmy.world avatar

Two hot dogs in the same got dang bun

Furbag,

Two’o’dem dang ol’ hawtdawgs, man I tell’ya hwat.

IDontHavePantsOn,

Your wife, and don’t call me dog.

jaybone,

I’m not your dog, fam.

IDontHavePantsOn,

Whatever not your dog, but don’t call me fam.

tigeruppercut,

Oh yeah, they’ve got those dogs at this place

https://lemmy.zip/pictrs/image/d46af88b-7adb-4b77-92bf-3983a06d9705.webp

co209, (edited ) in Double Barrel

Let me introduce to you the Brazilian hot dog:

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/f7106f13-03b1-4d11-8fc9-6e28369bd67d.jpeg

In my region of Brazil we have three flavors (!!!) of hot dog: beef (filled with meaty Bolognese), chicken (shredded chicken cooked in tomato sauce) and mixed (both; yes, BOTH!!).

Things Brazilians put in hotdogs:

  • Hot dogs. How many, you ask? Well, how many do you want?
  • Corn
  • Peas
  • Ground beef
  • Chicken
  • Cheese
  • Cabbage
  • Vinaigrette
  • Mashed potatoes
  • Bacon
  • Crispy straw potatoes
  • Olives
  • Cooked quail eggs
Jorgelino,

There is no combination of ingredients a brazilian won’t dare mix.

Americans will be whining about pineapple on pizza while Brazil is adding banana, chocolate, ribs and potato chips to it.

I’m honestly all for it, i hate this dumbass stigma people have over changing “traditional recipies”. Fuck that, mix it up, throw shit at the all until it sticks, just make me something that tastes good.

dog_, in The Da Vinci Cookie

Da Vinki?

name_NULL111653,

Certe, meum frater.

AutistoMephisto, in You ask too much of him
@AutistoMephisto@lemmy.world avatar

If an angel appears before you in human form, they come bearing good news. If they appear before you in their true form, they come bearing responsibility.

Test_Tickles,

In my experience, if they appear before you in human form, it will cost you a few hundo to fuck it. If they appear in the other form, then if you offer it some of whatever you just took, it will fuck you for free.

werefreeatlast,

Fuck that I’m carrying a helo just in case. Toss on the meatball with wings at first sight. I need me some good news.

postmateDumbass, (edited ) in Double Barrel
perishthethought,

Awww, there’s a name I haven’t heard in a long time. Thanks!

Snapz,

This is truly, California’s gold!

objectionist, in How Croissants are made
@objectionist@lemmy.world avatar

motherfucker just ruined my favorite pastry

platypus_plumba,

Fuck, he just ruined my favorite bug!

kittenzrulz123, in Wake up!

Fun fact: cats don’t sleep so it probably thought the person might be dead

M137,
@M137@lemmy.world avatar

I don’t get this humour. Or do you really think they don’t sleep?

kittenzrulz123,

Clarification: they don’t sleep like people, cats are always ready to defend themselves and prefer shorter naps

SpaceCowboy, in Its a doggy dog world out there
@SpaceCowboy@lemmy.ca avatar

Also it’s actually not that hard to quit smoking. I’ve quit smoking four times.

Akasazh,
@Akasazh@feddit.nl avatar

When I used to smoke I made the new years resolution ever year ‘to stop more often next year’

I go on holiday more nowadays, feels like a better use of the money

anarchy79,
@anarchy79@lemmy.world avatar

That is fucking hilarious! Is what a 15-year old high-schooler would say!

charonn0,
@charonn0@startrek.website avatar

Close. It’s from someone that a 15 year old high schooler might be assigned to read.

anarchy79,
@anarchy79@lemmy.world avatar

WC Fields? I doubt a single 15 year old in America knows who that even is. The point is that the joke is almost a hundred years old. Do you want to do Who’s on First too?

LarmyOfLone,

On a serious note, there is a type of natural Antidepressant in cigarette smoke (MAOIs) which you come off of like 2 weeks delayed because it has a type of reservoir in the body. So once you quit you can get like delayed withdrawal symptoms.

SpaceCowboy,
@SpaceCowboy@lemmy.ca avatar

Yeah, can confirm, though it was usually around a week for me. First couple of days are rough, then you start feeling better, then a few days later you feel like shit again.

LarmyOfLone,

Yeah not sure about the time frame. For me it wasn’t too bad because I switched to vaping so I still had nicotine. But it would have helped if I had known why I was suddenly in such a super bad mood for a few days haha.

Squorlple, in Overanalyzing shitposts is my specialty.
@Squorlple@lemmy.world avatar
ininewcrow,
@ininewcrow@lemmy.ca avatar

or wrong type of donut … the ones pictured are whole donuts, not donuts with holes

KrankyKong,

How can you tell?

Ghostalmedia,
@Ghostalmedia@lemmy.world avatar

5 little ones? Do they all work?

Squorlple,
@Squorlple@lemmy.world avatar

He’s part echidna

hperrin, in If you like pina coladas, you might also like walks in the rain

If you like air but you don’t like pure oxygen, then you actually like nitrogen more than oxygen.

Kedly,

Anti Death Penalty US’ers really dont agree with you atm

p1mrx,

I like pure oxygen just fine at 0.2 atm.

afraid_of_zombies,

So does fire. RIP Apollo 1.

p1mrx, (edited )

Apollo 1 used pure oxygen at 1 atm. At 0.2 atm they’d be fine.

Donjuanme, in Get in the zone!

This may be why the next generation isn’t driving as much, too much temptation to buy the brakes that won’t slow you down XD

OhStopYellingAtMe,
@OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world avatar

Are millennials ruining the brake industry with their non-stop refusals to stop or slow down?

Imgonnatrythis, in It's as if my eyes have been opened for the very first time...

Now I’m wondering if there is anything that isn’t better in waffle form.

V4sh3r,
@V4sh3r@lemmy.world avatar

In an effort to cut down on what needs to be washed. I regularly cook eggs in waffle form after the waffles are done.

OfficeMonkey,

… Belgian style waffle or closer to Eggo? I’d be concerned about the deep pockets of the Belgian (non-Leige) waffles. Do you add any support material or stuffing, or just eggs?

Thank you, I’m planning for next weekend with my kid. =)

FlyingSquid,
@FlyingSquid@lemmy.world avatar

For-profit healthcare.

Sunforged,

Let’s put it in and leave it there.

bdonvr,

I mean have we tried taking private health insurer CEOs and putting them all in a big waffle iron?

Transporter_Room_3,
@Transporter_Room_3@startrek.website avatar

I’ve got a waffle iron for that!

Its a bit broken, though. No heat, it’s made of wood, and it has a large blade that falls down at like… The drop of a hat. Or lever…

bighatchester,

I made a fried rice waffle one time . It was awesome! Got the idea from Sam the cooking guy .

MacFearrs, in Meeting a celebrity
bfg9k,
@bfg9k@lemmy.world avatar
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