@Kolanaki@yiffit.net
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Kolanaki

@Kolanaki@yiffit.net

I’m just a weird, furry, pan guy (cis he/him). I also have a big, blue username.

Currently on Earth for 8 years ensuring steps to unite humanity and usher us into the galactic civilization just so I can see my boyfriend again.

This profile is from a federated server and may be incomplete. Browse more on the original instance.

Kolanaki,
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Mmmm… Baby back ribs. 🤤

Kolanaki,
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New fish! New fish! New fish!

Kolanaki,
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Now give me a thrusting animation so I can stand on boxes in front of NPCs and slap them with my floppy dongus.

What happened to the PC games (or what happened to consoles)?

I got out of video game piracy for a while, but I’m coming back. One thing I have been absolutely SHOCKED by is how finding PC game torrents is actually kind of difficult from my normal sources. Now it’d be one thing if I just wasn’t seeing games, but for some reason Playstation and Switch have far more uploaders and...

Kolanaki, (edited )
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I only have problems finding PC games that use Denovu that haven’t been cracked. For obvious reasons. Even finding super niche indie content is relatively easy on most big trackers.

Kolanaki,
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Just crush up some ants from that colony and rub the resulting paste over your body before you shrink down.

Kolanaki,
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Safer doesn’t mean perfectly safe.

You could much more easily die from over consumption of alcohol than you could from smoking weed.

Kolanaki,
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Someone didn’t read the label that said to wash the ship in cold water only and shrank the fucker.

Kolanaki,
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Kaltoh operates on straight magic.

Kolanaki,
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Many places in the South. Swamps. Farmland. Etc.

Kolanaki,
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Why does this dude look like a real life Syndrome?

Kolanaki,
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The Setesh guard’s nose, dripping.

Kolanaki,
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Hahahahaha… No.

Kolanaki,
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“Halt! You have violated the law!”

Removes the Gray Mask

“Whoa! He was just here! You there, citizen, which way did that scoundrel run off?!”

Kolanaki,
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I can funny. I can sing. I can skibitty-doo-bop-doo-bop. And am fat.

Kolanaki,
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Exactly. This isn’t anyone’s grampa.

It’s their great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great grampa.

Kolanaki,
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Disgustingly delicious

Kolanaki, (edited )
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Oh. My. God.

You’re a genius!

I’m sure you could make a corn dog analogue that’s close enough without cornmeal based batter. Heck, use breakfast sausage, dip in pancake batter, deep fry. Best pigs in a blanket ever. 🤤

Kolanaki,
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But I’m going to need a drink.

Wash those 7 corn dogs down with an entire 2-liter of Coca-Cola.

Kolanaki,
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“The curtains are just fucking blue.”

Kolanaki,
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You’re going the right way for a smacked bottom and I don’t care who knows it!

Kolanaki,
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I was in the top 0.5% of time listened; but I play a relaxing sounds playlist when I sleep so it feels like cheating.

Kolanaki,
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“There are four lights!”

“I’m sorry, that is incorrect. I’m afraid you’ve failed your driver’s test and will not be issued a license to operate a motor vehicle at this time.”

Kolanaki,
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Plain-ass HTML with nothing but text.

Kolanaki,
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Some

Kolanaki, (edited )
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I don’t like the sound of my butthole being sealed by bolts. It doesn’t sound fun; it sounds painful.

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